I also tend to link music up with emotion as most people probably do). I’ll pick a band or a particular song it’ll be my sad song. or my happy song. I just find it horrible how the emotion actually seems to seep from my heart when those songs play. And when the song is linked to a painful experience, the one thing I DO NOT WANT TO DO is listen to it when I’m feeling down. Hence, I am constantly on the look out for new music, new bands, new songs – that people find so utterly ridiculous and hard to listen to, allowing the song to live on without any mental attachments.

The radio terrifies me. It symbolizes randomness to such an extent that I fear that my sad and depressive slit my wrist song will play the day I feel sad and depressive in a slit my wrist way. So, when I have completely killed all the new albums in my car, I have to drive in silence and listen to the thoughts in my head. At times the thoughts and memories are so vivid that I lose track of what I am currently doing. Many a times, I’ve arrived at my destination not remembering just HOW I got there. yes, by car, but mentally by time hoping – skipping through the fourth dimension at will.

Somehow these memories and thoughts seem to scare me more than the randomized radio music. And the constant attempt between switching between these modes are emotionally and mentally draining.

So my solution?
Deal with your issues before you get in the damn car.